The Work We All Avoid… But That Changes Everything
Meditation and mindfulness have given me the ability to know: I am not my emotions. I am not my frustration. I am not my stress.
I was ready to smash mud against the wall. Maybe even break some plates. Or rip off the door handles—something, anything.
It wasn’t just frustration. It was something deeper. An agitation that felt like it had hijacked my body, dripping with fear and fury.
Have you been there? When everything and everyone irritates you, but deep down, you know—it’s not really them?
I knew that if I wasn’t careful, I’d leave a wake of destruction behind me. Even if I didn’t lash out, even if I kept my words measured, the energy alone would reverberate through my interactions, my decisions, my day.
And here’s the thing:
That anger wasn’t me.
It was a state I was in. A moment I was experiencing.
✨ Meditation and mindfulness have given me the ability to know: I am not my emotions. I am not my frustration. I am not my stress.
But that doesn’t mean ignoring it.
Our first instinct when these emotions arise? Push them down. Disown them. Hide them under productivity, numbing, distraction. But when we do that? They don’t disappear. They fester. They grow. And they carve paths of destruction—inside us and around us.
So, instead of resisting, I did what I teach. I turned toward it.
A Simple But Powerful Reset
Try it.
Just a few moments of gentle touch can:
🌿 Activate the parasympathetic nervous system (rest + digest mode).
🌱 Stimulate oxytocin (the “connection” hormone).
✨ Calm the vagus nerve, signaling safety to the brain.
💨 Allow for deeper breathing, reducing the chemical flood of stress.
And most importantly? It created space.
Space between me and the intensity of the moment.
Space to shift from, “This is happening to me” → to “Why is this here? What is this telling me?”
And the answer always varies.
Sometimes, it’s insight into what someone else is experiencing—offering me greater clarity and empathy.
Sometimes, it’s a signal that I’ve been neglecting a change I know is needed.
But always, there is insight—if I’m willing to listen.
The Hard Work of Peace
At our recent retreat, when I asked what people most wanted in their lives, the answer was overwhelmingly the same:
Peace. Internal peace.
Not more time. Not more money. Not even more success.
But here’s the truth: Peace isn’t something we find—it’s something we cultivate.
And while it’s simple, it’s not easy.
It requires:
🔥 Courage to face what’s within, even when it’s uncomfortable.
🌿 Commitment to practice, reflect, and grow—day after day.
🌱 Hard work to release old stories and build new ways of being.
And while this work is challenging, staying stuck is harder.
The choice? Choose your hard.
Let’s Cultivate Peace—Together
Join Calm & Connect – a space where we practice grounding ourselves, creating clarity, and finding calm.
📅 Next Session: Sunday, February 09, 2025 at 10 AM CST
👉 Sign Up Here
Or, if you’re an organization looking to support your teams in managing stress and creating clarity, let’s talk about The Reset Room—a transformative, multi-sensory experience designed to train the mind and reset the nervous system.
✨ Because when we master our minds, we reclaim our lives.
👉 Schedule The Alignment and Clarity Call here.
P.S. How do you bring yourself back when your mind runs away? Reply and let me know—I’d love to hear. 💬
🌀Stress isn’t the enemy—it’s the invitation.🌀
Not all stress is created equal. While some drains us, other types stretch and grow us into who we’re meant to become. The key? Learning how to engage with stress intentionally—leaning into discomfort that fuels growth while replenishing your inner reserves to avoid burnout.
Stress gets a bad rap. And honestly, I get it. It's exhausting. Overwhelming. The kind of thing we often want to step away from, push under the rug, or numb altogether.
But here's something I've come to realize: not all stress is created equal.
Yes, there's the stress that drains us—the kind we all want less of. But there's also stress that has the power to stretch us, to expand our capacity, and to help us grow into the person we're meant to become.
Recently, I came across a National Geographic article that reinforced an idea we've explored before: a life completely devoid of stress isn't actually good for us. Studies show that people with no stress are more likely to experience cognitive decline.
Why?
Because our brains thrive on novelty and challenge. The hippocampus—our brain's hub for memory and learning—loves newness. Every time we lean into something new or uncomfortable, we're feeding it, strengthening it, keeping it sharp as we age.
The question, then, isn't “How do I avoid stress?” but rather, “How do I engage with it in a way that stretches me without breaking me?”
Two Keys to Navigating Stress
Not recklessly, but with curiosity and intention.
Because sometimes, stress is an invitation to grow.
Maybe it's showing up differently with family or in-laws, evolving past those long-standing dynamics that seem stuck at age 15 (or, let's be honest, age 5🤭). Maybe it's challenging yourself to handle a work deadline with clarity rather than chaos or breaking free from that inner dialogue that drains your energy.
This doesn't mean every stressor is worth leaning into. (I'm definitely not asking you to keep your hand on a hot stove!) But discomfort that stretches us—that nudges us toward growth—is worth exploring.
This process, called interoception, takes into account how well you've slept, what you've eaten, and the emotional or physical load you're carrying.
When your “financial” reserves are low, even small stressors can feel like mountains. That's why it's so important—especially in busy seasons—to replenish your internal “bank account.”
For me, that looks like:
A daily morning meditation to start the day grounded.
Committing to physical movement, even when it's tempting to skip it.
Prioritizing 8 hours of sleep to let my body restore itself.
For you, it might mean:
Limiting inflammatory habits like extra alcohol or sugar.
Blocking off time in your calendar for rest or meaningful connection.
Building intentional pauses into your day to recalibrate before stress builds.
What will help you save and replenish your reserves this season?
This Week's Calm & Connect: Cultivating Peace Amid the Swirl
This Sunday at 11am ET, I'll be diving into these ideas in our Calm & Connect session. Together, we'll explore how to navigate stress with intention and cultivate equanimity in the midst of it all.
👉🏼 Click here to sign up
Whether you're feeling stretched thin or simply want to center yourself for the weeks ahead, I'd love to have you join us.
A Rare Opportunity to Shed the Stress Before 2025 🎉🎊🎈
I've had such a blast facilitating many incredible MCC sessions already, and the transformations have been inspiring. While so many of the sessions have been exactly what I needed, technology hasn't exactly been my friend - and let's be honest, I have had a blast doing these!
That's why I'm keeping a few more spots open. I want to submit the absolute best two sessions for my certification while seeing who else I can support!
If this has been calling to you—or if you're ready to offload stress and shed what's no longer worth carrying into 2025—this is your chance to step into clarity and possibility.
These sessions are discounted to $275 (normally $675), will be recorded (audio only!) for evaluation purposes, and securely discarded afterward. You can sign up for 1 or TWO!
👉 Click here to book your session
Let's create the space for you to show up lighter, clearer, and more aligned in the new year.
Let's Step Into Growth Together
This season, let's not just survive stress—let's engage with it in ways that stretch us, evolve us, and prepare us for what's next.
Remember: how we end this year shapes how we begin the next. Let's make it intentional.
P.S. If you're ready to dive deeper into these practices, I'm still offering two discounted MCC coaching sessions for new clients through December. Let's uncover what's possible for you. 👉 Click here to book.
How Redefining Failure Unlocks Unimaginable Growth and Success
Fear of failure. Studies reveal that up to 70% of people hold back from pursuing their dreams due to this very fear.
Happy Halloween!
🎃 Ghosts, haunted houses, and horror movies might be spooky, but you know what’s really terrifying? The fear that keeps us stuck and stops us from reaching new heights.
Fear of failure. Studies reveal that up to 70% of people hold back from pursuing their dreams due to this very fear.
In our last Calm & Connect conversation, we explored a powerful truth: we’ve been getting failure all wrong.
In English and particularly in Western culture, failure has become a destination—an endpoint that feels mutually exclusive with success. It’s as though you either reach “success” or fall into “failure,” with no space in between. And this binary mindset is holding us back.
When failure is seen as an identity—“I failed, so I am a failure”—it prevents us from trying new things, embracing a growth mindset, innovating, and thriving as human beings. We forget, as Archbishop Desmond Tutu reminds us, that “we’re not meant to be perfect from the word ‘go’.”
But not all cultures share this perspective. In Mandarin, failure is inherently understood as part of growth, and in Portuguese, the word “fracasso” refers to failure as a temporary condition, not a permanent state. It encourages resilience and persistence, recognizing that failure isn’t final—it’s just another chapter in the journey.
A Personal Story: Pushing My Growing Edge
Recently, I attended the BrainTrust Live Women’s Conference in Nashville, where the theme was failure.
Wildly successful entrepreneurs—those who have built multi-million-dollar companies—shared their stories, not just of their achievements, but of their failures and what those failures taught them both personally and professionally.
I found myself in that room feeling both inspired and uncomfortable. Why? Because I was pushing at my own growing edge. As many of you know, I’m currently building The Reset Room alongside my dear friend and colleague, Mirette Seireg. It’s a vision that we—and many others—believe has the potential to add tremendous value to organizations and institutions.
But here’s what I’ve come to realize: when I sit in that fear, I do nothing. The project doesn’t grow; neither do I. But when I remember that failure isn’t a stop sign—it’s not a period at the end of a sentence—but rather an opportunity to learn, iterate, and improve, my mindset shifts.
Failure becomes a catalyst for growth, a stepping stone on the path to progress. 🌱✨
So, I Ask You:
Where are you afraid to fail?
Where have you seen failure as “the end,” and what would happen if you shifted your perspective to see it as a learning curve on the path to success?
Whether it’s a new relationship, a job, a venture, or something deeply personal—how might redefining failure open the floodgates to success?
Navigating Fear and Stress this Week
To help you navigate the stress and uncertainty in the coming days, I’m offering three opportunities to join me for live meditations:
1️⃣ Calm & Connect: Sunday, 10am CT—Shift your mindset as we dive deeper into topics like fear, failure, and resilience. Sign up here.
2️⃣ Insight Timer Live: Election Day, Tuesday, 10am CT & 3pm C.
"Finding Calm Amidst the Storm." Join these free meditations to reconnect with clarity and inner peace during tense times.
Let’s be honest, this is a far better way to spend your time than being glued to the rollercoaster of news reporting all day. Give yourself this gift of space to breathe, center, and find resilience amidst the chaos.
Click the links below 👇 to sign up and prioritize your mental wellbeing this week. Let’s take a collective breath and lead with intention.
Important November Calm & Connect Updates 💛
Just a heads up! Our next Calm & Connect falls on the same day as Daylight Savings Time, but our session time remains the same:
Sunday, November 3rd, 8am PT / 11am ET.
Please note: On November 17th, due to Rachel's schedule, Calm and Connect will be held one hour earlier at 7am PT / 10am ET.
Looking forward to connecting with you!
UPCOMING EVENTS
Gratitude + Tools To Navigate Stress
Every moment is an opportunity to choose differently. To rewrite narratives, and to rewire the way we respond to our triggers, to our anger and to our fears.
Let's have a real talk. As November further unfurls, you'll be swimming in messages that spotlight gratitude. And while that's beautifully important, I’d like to dive into something that’s equally needed in the midst of storms, challenges and complex conversations.
You know the ones that can send you reeling?
A memory surfaces: a while back, on a day that began like any other, I faced a setback – and really a verbal and personal attack that left me staggering. Shocked, really… And in that moment, against all data and practicality, self-doubt surged… it was so palpable. The attack was reflective of something said to me in my youth, that, for a time, had defined me - how I viewed myself and the world. I was young and I didn’t know better. So these words, meant to drive a dagger where it would be most felt, resurfaced that wound.
Fear and anger boiled, and I could feel its potential to take over. Its potential to guide my thoughts, my actions, and my state of mind. But in that same instant, I also saw something different, a glimmer.
That glimmer beckoned me to breathe, to not respond, and to pause. To have compassion.
I was able to unhook my brain from stress and fear (harnessing the advice and direction I so often give others), and that piercing moment quickly transformed into a series of stunning realizations.
Not only was there tremendous learning which seeped into my bones, but the biggest gift? The opportunity to re-write a decades-old narrative, and to choose how I wanted to integrate and embed that moment and its meaning.
The reminder? Every moment is an opportunity to choose differently. To rewrite narratives, and to rewire the way we respond to our triggers, to our anger and to our fears.
Because when we act from a place driven by the above, the results? Ineffective at best, and but more often than not, destructive to ourselves and beyond.
🌊 The 3 C’s: A Compass for Navigating Rough Seas 🌊
Compassion: There is a wild misunderstanding that compassion is complacency. Rather, true compassion is fierce, and it facilitates our second C, Clarity. Embrace yourself with the same warmth and understanding you'd offer a dear friend. Extend that gentle compassion to others too – In doing so, you'll find setbacks morphing into bridges of connection and healing.
Clarity: Amid life's whirlwinds, PAUSE. With that fierce compassion, take a courageous moment to truly see, to discern the path ahead. By doing this, you not only navigate your immediate surroundings but also the broader canvas of life, ensuring you and those around you thrive.
Conscious Action: Actions speak louder than words, but conscious actions echo into eternity. Empowered by compassion and guided by clarity, make choices that are thoughtful and deliberate, considering both personal well-being and the collective good.
💌 Redefining Gratitude & A Special Invitation 💌
While gratitude is the buzzword of November, let's redefine it. Don't just be thankful for the peaks; find strength and gratitude in the valleys. Those challenges? They’re not stumbling blocks; they’re stepping stones to our brightest self.
Stress In advance Of Holidays
When stress becomes king, life can feel like a foggy maze. Your vision and hearing literally narrows, Decisions are harder, the joy in little moments fades, and our empathy—the very thing that connects us—gets lost in the shuffle.
As the leaves fall and the air chills, there is the palpable festive joyful buzz.
And, there is also a sneaky little monster that begins to peek around the corner: stress.
So before it’s in full force, I want to get real and address how to make it work for you, not against you. Because we’ve all felt that chokehold.
That 3 am stare-down with the ceiling, or in my case, that trip to the hospital over a decade ago. It’s raw, it’s real, and it’s oh-so-human. But when stress goes from challenging to soul-crushing? That's where burnout dims our brightest moments.
✅ The Goldilocks Curve of Stress – Your GPS to Thriving
Imagine Amy Arnsten’s bell curve which correlates stress with productivity and wellbeing. At its peak, stress gives you wings, it’s like you are flying, fueling passion and productivity. But then when you start to stray towards too little, or today’s topic, too much stress, you can quickly find yourself at the epicenter of chaos.
And the impact?
It’s messy.
When stress becomes king, life can feel like a foggy maze. Your vision and hearing literally narrows, Decisions are harder, the joy in little moments fades, and our empathy—the very thing that connects us—gets lost in the shuffle.
😬 Personalize Your Stress Strategy
But first it requires acknowledging that sticking your head in the sand and ignoring the signs is a recipe for disaster. Knowing where you stand on the stress spectrum at any moment is what keeps you from losing your marbles.
Further, each of us carries our own set of worries, burdens, triggers and challenges. Reflecting on what activates you, is a critical key – or better stated, lifeline - to strategizing and navigating this season. Because balance isn’t just a “nice to have.” It’s a must – or bust.”
Whether you are ready to accelerate your leadership, dive deeper, or bring invaluable mindfulness and neuro-based tools to your organization, reach out, let’s connect.
How to Leverage the Power of A Pause + Micro Moments
Amidst agitation, a simple moment transformed everything. Kneeling on the floor, scrubbing away frustration, I realized the choice before me: perpetuate the turmoil or pivot. Micro-moments hold incredible power—they reset our days, mend relationships, and alter our inner dialogue. It’s about awareness, mindfulness, and building that mental muscle. Gift yourself pauses throughout the day; it’s in these moments that a simple pivot can lead to profound shifts. Embrace these opportunities; they're catalysts for positive change.
Have you recently felt riddled with agitation? Or ever? If you have, you are not alone.
Let me tell you about a moment which, after intense agitation, changed everything: my perspective, my approach and my resolution. And it boiled down to a simple micro-moment. That moment where I chose to pause, to reflect, and pivot…
A few months ago, I had the gift of taking care of two precious, personality-filled pugs, Bear & Bella. In addition to their love, they offered invaluable lessons (click here for the first, fabulous edition :D ):
You know those mornings where you wake up and before you open your eyes, you are already agitated? At what, you have no idea! Perhaps it was a disturbing dream that you can’t even remember, but the urge is to go back to sleep and maybe, just maybe, shake the dream and shake the mood.
One particular morning, after a rough night of sleep, aware I had to deal with a sizable work issue, I groggily rolled over willing myself into a better mindset…
AND THEN… I smelled it.
This wasn’t the first day this had happened. It was the 5th(!!) day.
STRONG. Pungent. Poop. 😩
No matter how late I walked these precious pups - or how early I rose… 2 am on the living room floor was their newfound favorite time and place to relieve themselves.
Already agitated, you can imagine how this impacted my state of mind. I was DONE.
Done with the poo, done with the underlying agitation and issues.
As I knelt on the floor, scrubbing (and scrubbing… and scrubbing) the hardwood floor, I realized that my hands were mimicking my brain: attacking an issue, creating more distress and frustration.
So I stopped.
It was one of those micro-moments where I had a choice: further enmesh myself in my agitation and have that influence the rest of my day - which would be detrimental…
OR…
Pause, acknowledge the frustration without digging a deeper hole, and then pivot: look at how to best resolve the situation at hand and ask myself simple, yet critical situation-shifting questions.
Micro-moments are incredible opportunities that fill our days. And when we leverage them, we:
🧠 Reset and dramatically change the course of the hours and days that follow.
🧠 Turn around problematic situations with colleagues, clients and family members.
🧠 Create opportunities to ask a question (instead of jumping to conclusions), transforming our communication and relationships.
🧠 Reboot between engagements and meetings
🧠 Reroute problematic and debilitating inner dialogue
🧠 Ensure everyone feels heard and understood.
How do YOU leverage micro-moments?
It begins with awareness. It begins with mindfulness. And just like any muscle you build, it gets stronger with use.
Whether you set an alarm or use the “breathe” reminder on your phone, gift yourself regular moments to pause, reflect, and see if there is a simple or needed pivot.
I promise, you won’t regret it.
Ready for 1:1 Leadership + Development Coaching? Let's Talk.