Anxiety and Compassion: Learning to Work with Your Mind 🙌

Today, I want to share something about anxiety, and how, oddly enough, it's often our own compassion showing up in disguise. Anxiety has been a part of my journey, too—one that's driven me into this work of learning to befriend my own mind.

Anxiety has a way of taking root in the unknown. The moment our brain senses uncertainty, it kicks into “protection mode,” imagining all the worst-case scenarios to help us prepare. But instead of helping us, it usually just paralyzes us.

It's almost as if our brain clutches onto anxiety like a well-worn security blanket, thinking, “If I hold onto this, I'll stay safe.” The problem? That “blanket” doesn't actually keep us safe. It keeps us stuck.

This weekend, Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche helped me see anxiety in a new light. What's happening when we feel anxiety is actually compassion. Our mind wants to help, to comfort, but because it lacks clear direction, it reaches for the quick-fix—something to numb the discomfort. For some of us, it's reaching for a purchase, hiding in the pantry, a fight, or a glass of wine. But this well-meaning urge to “fix” can actually amplify the problem.

Listening to the Body's Early Warnings

One thing I've noticed—and maybe you have too—is that our body often knows anxiety is brewing before our brain even catches on. Maybe it's a quickening heart, a tightening in the chest, or that scatterbrained feeling.

Instead of checking out in that moment, what if we checked in?

For me, that shift came when I realized that anxiety shows up as my brain's way of protecting me—a relentless need to “know” an outcome in uncertain situations. Here's something fascinating: our brains are prediction machines, constantly scanning for answers to help us feel secure. They want to be “right” because accuracy kept our ancestors alive. But when we face ambiguity, our brains can spiral into worst-case scenarios, feeding anxiety instead of offering clarity.

Over the years, I've discovered tools that help me work with my mind rather than fight it. Some of these tools are exercises I teach to organizations and clients—great for building resilience—and others are quick resets for when you're on the go. One practice that's been especially invaluable lately? Pausing and connecting with curiosity and compassion.

Challenging the Anxious Brain

In the middle of a busy grocery store recently, I found myself “back in the attic” of my mind—everything felt dim and narrow, like I was on autopilot, barely noticing what I was putting in my cart.

With my scattered mind, I stopped, placed a hand over my heart, and gently rubbed it. This small, grounding gesture—taught to me by a mentor—sends a signal to the nervous system, telling it to settle down. Physical touch activates the vagus nerve, helping to calm the body, while reminding both heart and mind that it's safe to relax. Paired with a few slow, deep breaths, this act disrupts the anxiety loop just enough to create space for a shift in perspective.

After grounding myself, I posed a simple question to my brain: “What if it's better than I could ever imagine? What would that look like?” This question disrupts the anxious cycle by offering my mind something positive to consider. It's like saying to my brain, “I hear you, but let's also consider this.” This shift from “What if everything goes wrong?” to “What if things turn out beautifully?” opens up a mental space where anxiety can transform into curiosity and even hope.

The Power of Compassionate Curiosity

The beauty of this practice isn't that it erases anxiety—it transforms our relationship with it. By building a more compassionate, less reactive connection with our minds, we create space for other possibilities.

I often teach and speak on The BeAbove Leadership model called the 7 Levels of Effectiveness, which guides us from fear and frustration into courage, and ultimately, innovation. We can't expect ourselves to leap from fear to innovation in one go. But this practice offers a bridge: it allows us to step into courage, opening the door to countless possibilities and new ways to navigate what we once thought were impossible situations. Through this shift, even the most daunting moments can be reimagined, revealing unexpected paths forward.

Through this shift, even the most daunting moments can be reimagined, revealing unexpected paths forward.

Your Invitation to Pause, Connect, and Find Calm

As I step into the final stages of my journey to become a Master Certified Coach (MCC)—after thousands of hours coaching and training others—I'm thrilled to offer two discounted coaching sessions to new clients who are open to recording the sessions (audio only!) as part of my evaluation process and exam.

If you're looking to dig deeper, gain clarity, or simply reconnect with a sense of calm, I'd be honored to support you. This is for a very limited time and only available to a few individuals.

Have Questions? Simply reply to this email or contact her at 404-840-2238. 

Alternatively - ready to dig in?!? Grab your spot here! 

AND if you're searching for a supportive space to navigate this season with curiosity and clarity, join me for our free Calm & Connect sessions. This week, our session time has shifted to 10am ET (from 11am ET), and I'd LOVE for you to join us. Together, we'll practice grounding ourselves, connecting with compassion, and finding clarity amid the chaos.

Wishing you ease, curiosity, and peace, wherever you are.

P.S. You have permission to take a pause, just like you would offer to someone else in need. Let's give that gift to ourselves, too.

Embracing Change and Living in the Moment: My Journey to Nashville

LOVE, LOSS, AND NEW BEGINNINGS

Good morning!

It's been a while, and I've missed connecting with you. We have a lot to catch up on. Since we last connected, I embarked on quite a journey: returning from my six-month semi-sabbatical in Victoria, BC—a place I hold dear—spending a brief moment in Colorado with family, friends, and colleagues, and finally making a permanent move to Nashville, TN.

On May 6th, 2024, my entire storage unit, locked away since 2021, arrived from Texas. On May 7th, my heart ached as I said goodbye to one of the most precious beings in my life: my 16-year-old Maltese, Cooper.🐾

It felt as though he was saying, “Mom, I got you home. Now it's my time to rest.” 

Over the years, doctors warned me to prepare for this moment. But Cooper had an incredible spirit and seemed to live on nine lives. Each moment we shared, particularly towards the end, reminded me of a profound truth: we never know how long we have with the ones we love.

This realization can either paralyze us with fear and anxiety or be a precious gift—an opportunity to embrace each moment with love, gratitude, and presence.

In our Western culture, we often avoid discussing aging, death, and dying. We fear it and swipe left when it comes up. However, in cultures like Mexico, where age and death are embraced, every moment is lived with greater vitality and appreciation. By accepting the inevitable, it no longer lingers in the shadows but fiercely reminds us that every moment is unique and precious.

Living in Gratitude + Embracing New Beginnings🙏🏼

Reflecting on these experiences, I realize the preciousness of time and the importance of living in the present. We often get caught up in the hustle, forgetting to savor the beauty of each moment. But life, in all its imperfections, offers countless opportunities for gratitude and growth.

 And as I settle into Nashville, I'm excited about the new friendships and opportunities this city will bring. If you know anyone in Nashville who might be interested in connecting—whether for friendship or professional collaborations—I'd love an introduction - so please do not hesitate to reply to this email!!

Exciting Work Ahead🎉

On the professional front, there's a lot happening. At the end of the month, I'll be running two Unleash Mindful Leadership sessions for a global investment bank, an executive presence + public speaking event for a tech company, and several events focusing on how to effectively navigate stress—essential with the upcoming elections—and how to shift from frustration and fear to courage and innovation.

If your organization could benefit from our support and expertise, I'd love to explore how we can collaborate. Now is the perfect time to start the conversation, as we'll soon be stepping into the busy fall and election season. Let's work together to create resilient, mindful, and empowered teams.

An Invitation to Reflect and Connect

Today, I invite you to reflect on your relationship with time and change. Where might you be holding back in fear? How can you embrace the present moment with more gratitude and love?

Thank you for being part of this journey with me. Let's continue to embrace change, nurture our endeavors, and trust in the unfolding beauty of life

P.S. If you're navigating your own sea of change, remember: it's not just about weathering the storm. It's about developing the skills and learning to sail in new directions. If you're ready to embrace and cultivate change, reach out—I'd love to hear from you!

P.P.S. Don't forget to join us for Calm & Connect this Sunday, June 16th at 8 AM PST / 11 AM EST. It's a wonderful way to strengthen the muscle of mindfulness and dive into essential reflection alongside others.